I like to challenge myself.
You name it......
Hot dog eating contests
Pie eating.....
Wine shots....
Half Ironmen I'm not quite..... ready..... for.....
And Grief.
Sunday was Mother's Day which is the MOTHER of ALL DAYS for those who have lost.
But I took it. I took the Mother's Day Challenge. I made a decision to embrace the idea of Mother's Day....to not be hatin', to be out there, fully, me and Mother's Day.
And to smile.
There was some thought behind it. I love my friends who are Moms, I loved being a mom and I love my mom. So there you have it.
HAHA! Here I am.....Take that Mother's Day!
This isn't me.
This isn't even two Moms.
This is Tenzing Norgay and Sir Edmund Hilary after summitting Mt. Everest.
But hey, my grief is a mountain and this is a journey....they look happy....and by God, I will take this Mother's Day Challenge.
I even told my friend Maria on Friday.
"Mother's Day will not get me down this year!"
"Ah Yah." She said with her skeptical Swedish grin. Why do the Swedish do that grin so well???
"Heather, it is okay, you know. You do not have to like this day."
"I do Maria. I can."
"Yes but if you change your mind, it is okay. And we love you"
And with that she tossed me a delicious Swedish Fish and left the building
Alas, another Mother's Day Challenge.
And so, So......I bought....I purchased cards with vigor, Mother's Day tissue paper and gift bags.
And I cooked. I made a mean potato salad with a lovely dill dressing. A baby green with buffalo mozzarella and fresh basil; champagne dressing.
And of course, a crisp Prosecco to wash it all down.
I did this with a Tenzing Norgay smile. And I stood on top of my Everest......with potato salad in hand!!!!!!
And got a migraine.
Not Just A Migraine.
The Mother F*ckers of Migraines. The 'Oh My HELL my head should no longer be a part of my BODY migraines. The cluster of aura, numbness, headache migraine. The migraines that hurt so bad you throw up....because nothing wants to be in your body at that time.
You can't fight city hall.
You can't always fight the grief
And apparently Mother's Day is ALL WRAPPED UP with City Hall and bedfellows with the grief.
I met a friend at work on Monday.
"How was your Mother's Day?" She said.
"I got a piecing migraine and spent the day whimpering in my penguin pj's. How was yours? "
"I got food poisoning and almost pooped my pants next to the hummus and carrots at King Soopers."
"Good Times?"
"Good Times."
"Grief does not change you Hazel. It reveals you." John Green, The Fault in our Stars
Tuesday, May 10, 2016
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