Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Find those Moments!

In the spirit of Thanksgiving....

that and I am baking at 11:30 at night....

I am thinking about my life and what makes me happy....

One of the 'perks' of being a special needs mom is that you meet other special needs moms. I swear, if I'm ever caught on the Golden Gate bridge, in the middle of an alien attack in a snow storm, don't call Superman or Spiderman, call one of these moms; they are truly amazing. I live off of their strength like one of those crazy creatures in Aliens.

If you need a source of inspiration this weekend, take a tip from my friend Maria. She wrote this week two in the ICU....

MOMENTS OF JOY

I read somewhere that happy people focus on moments of joy rather than overall happiness. I am sure many people dread the life we live. A sick young child with a life threatening progressive disorder without a cure in sight, how much worse can it be? I sometimes see it for a split second in people's eyes, but I hope they never see it staring back at them. The simple reason is that we feel happy in the middle of all our stress and uncertainty. We have completely moved away from finding complete happiness in all parts of our lives. The focus is on moments of joy, and they sure are there for us.


Wow

So on Thursday.....

If the turkey is dry....

And the mashed potatoes are runny.....

And crazy Uncle Charlie just pinched your ass because he's had too much to drink....

And you found a cat hair in Aunt Nancy's jello mold.....

Take a deep breath and find your moment of joy....

You might have to dig deep but you can find it.

9 comments:

Lowrie said...

Amen!! .......I remember, when growing up, my Dad telling me to "be happy no matter what state you're in!" (And, I know that didn't mean Colorado or Illinois!!) We all can count our blessings and smile! Happiness is a state of mind and it's contagious!!

I firmly believe God knows what He's doing when he gives these precious, special kids to parents! The moms I know with special kids are AMAZING sources of strength and optimism! .....Several of these parents are in my own family: YOU!! and my stepson and daughter-in-law! Thank you for being an inspiration to everyone around you! You touch many lives with your words and actions! God bless you!!

Happy Thanksgiving! Have a wonderful time with the family!

Love you!

Lowrie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lowrie said...

Well, don't know what happened, but it posted twice. I deleted the duplicate one! But, it still shows up that it happened. Sorry!!

byshe said...

Growing up with a 'special needs' dad (he became a paraplegic when I was 5), I too lived finding joy in the moments rather than the gestalt of our family life. When people would talk too loudly, (assuming dad was deaf), or too closely (assuming dad was incapable of wheeling to them) or worst of all for me, speaking to him too simply (assuming dad was intellectually challenged), dad would stand (or wheel as the case may be) his ground. He would talk back quietly, wheel to the speaker and answer in more than the monosyllabic manner in which he was addressed... but never did he make fun of those who assumed.
When I was young my greatest joy was crawling on his lap, even if the spasms he regularly suffered would skyrocket me off. When I was older, my joy came from walking/wheeling side by side. And when he died, I realized the greatest gift my father had given me was that of finding absolute joy in the sheer absoluteness of being.

HeatherS said...

Thank you both...I am sitting here with tears in my eyes....

Byshe, what a beautiful story and what a beautiful man.

Lowrie, the words of 'Great' Uncle Glenn always ring true. So proud to be a Simms :)

Happy, happy Thanksgiving.

ferfischer said...

I too am thankful for all the other special needs parents we have met - we certainly have a different perspective than most people and it helps to just be understood without explaining. As I posted on my blog about the moments of joy - sometimes I have a really hard time with this, but I try!

terena said...

Bravo. So true. People always ask, "How do you do it?" And the answer is finding the joy in every day, even when it seems impossible to find. Most people can't imagine any joy in a sick child, but we parents of special needs kids know the secret of life: joy is in the moment of breathing, of living, of being with your child. That's it. The rest is incidental.

You're right, there is no one more powerful in the Universe than us Special Needs Moms.

Maria said...

Heather,
Have a Happy Thanksgiving! Sarah gets to visit in the hospital tomorrow, so she will watch Polar Express with her brother in bed! Looking forward to a peaceful holiday with as few seizures as possible!

Hugs, Maria.

getbornmagmomma said...

Y'all are superwomen. And what a tribe you are! You do so much for the onlookers, teaching us the skill and discipline of living in the moment. You're zen.