Thursday, March 7, 2013

Zombie Apocalypse and Super Storm Bob:



I traveled to D.C this week. 24 hours before leaving I was diagnosed with a sinus infection.

There is nothing worse than flying with a sinus infection.

Except maybe a Zombie Apocalypse….which I’ll get to.

After said diagnosis, I explained to my doctor that I was flying the next day and the last time I flew with a sinus infection, I blew a blood vessel in my nose…without any Kleenex on hand and wearing a white shirt….yeah, I was that person you love to sit next to on the plane.

So she gave me a list of things I needed to be taking to fly with said infection. And I loaded myself up, and headed for the airport…..all sinusy and everything.

What is the point of a sinus? Don’t they just sound like they would be problematic? We have toes, fingers, noses and then the sinus….it just sounds like it would be an issue. SINUS

Not only was I sinusy but Super Storm Saturn was headed that direction too with the promise of dumping multiple feet of snow before the day was done.

No client is worth this.

But I boarded the plane, because I love an adventure. And my manager promised me sushi. And I love sushi as much as I love an adventure, maybe more.

“Take Sudafed before the plane takes off.” The doctor advised. Do you know that now in order to buy Sudafed, you have to fill out a form promising that you won’t turn it into meth? I had to show my id and everything. But I digress.

I plopped into the middle seat at 6:45 in the morning and quickly realized I forgot to take my pre-flight Sudafed. So I pulled it out, along with my mucinex, my antibiotics, ricola cough drops and a wad of Kleenex.

Try it sometime and see the reaction you get from your seat mates. It’s kind of funny.

The woman in the row ahead of me was talking to her daughter, “Well, say a little prayer for us. Everything is shutdown, it’s supposed to be pretty bad out there.”

Lovely, I thought, as I blew my nose. We are heading into the eye of the storm.

4 hours later we landed in the heart of Super Storm Saturn territory. I had prepared myself for the worst; feets of snow, polar bears and woolly mammoths.

It was raining.

Well, maybe it’s really icy. I thought.

Nah. It was cold, and wet but nothing worthy of a name like Saturn.

D.C had closed the Federal Government in anticipation of the storm. Do you know what happens in our Nation’s Capital when the government is closed?

Nothing. Really, the entire city was vacant. I jay-walked on M street without looking both ways. Restaurants were closed, people went home early. We found an open Starbucks with a disgruntled barista.

“You know what this is like,” I said to my manager while sipping my latte’ in the rain. “This is what it would be like if we had a Zombie Apocalypse; big cities totally deserted, a slight drizzle and a gray day. Seriously, I expect them to come up from the subway anytime now.”

My manager, who is quite used to me and my random thoughts nodded and offered me a snickerdoodle. “Zombie apocalypse?”

“And really,” I said. “Super Storm Saturn? This storm is not worthy of a planetary name. This is more like Super Storm Bob. Wow, that Snickerdoodle is really good.”

The best thing about being in D.C. during Super Storm Bob is going out for sushi because no one else is going out for sushi. We were the only one at SEI. And they gave us complimentary champagne. Maybe because they were bored or they felt bad that we were out with an impending Zombie Apocalypse; either way it was fabulous.

Today we visited our clients. It was a beautiful day in DC. The Government was open and I could no longer jaywalk on M street. Things were back to normal. When explaining to my clients how empty the city was, I stated with excitement; "The streets were empty! It was like a Zombie Apocalypse!"

To which they tilted their head, nodded slightly and were kinda quiet.

Some days it surprises me that my company lets me interact with their paying customers.

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